Monday, May 04, 2015

Nostalgia, fear and hurt- the unbeatable trio..

  • So there were no "miss you's" this time when everyone in the family met. No texts or phone calls saying that I should have been there or how the fun was halved without my presence. I guess I am beginning to fade into that ambiguity with even my family now and that hurts terribly
  • On that drive back I did think of him. We were talking about the old days in school, of friends and old times and there was this tangible urge to reinstate contact- friendships like such are hard to come by
  • The idea of having a kid scares and excites me at the same time. I would like to think that I am ready for it but every time I think of the strings that will tie me down with the responsibility, I freak out 
  • Am super scared of what life has for me in store, it is just so hazy at the moment
  • I've put on weight and its disgusting. So it's bald and fat currently- need I ask for more

Thursday, April 30, 2015

Just nonsense..

  • Life changes after getting married: like so many relationships, it gives you wings and yet clips you down
  •  Friends then, not so friends now.. Maybe a little more patience, attention and maturity would have found her in a better place or maybe it happens to everyone
  • Parents are the only people who stall their lives for you, while we race ahead
  • Getting nostalgic about home: Ma, Papa and that security I feel only with them. I refuse to grow up
  • A little more practicality, some more sense and a control over emotions: she’s never found herself lacking in so many aspects all at once
Just what will it take to feel more in her skin, accept who she is..

Friday, April 10, 2015

Angry things..

You say things,
He says things,
The threshold is crossed,
You almost want to quit, give up.. 

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Bloody, stupid insecurities..

It’s very strange- I have sort of a perfect life. I mean, one can be fussy about all that’s missing but once you compare it to what you have, it’s negligible. Still, yes “still”, I always fancy someone else's life. They are prettier, sizzling hot, more suave, more successful, brilliant orators, super intelligent, witty and funny, genuinely nice, dramatically lucky, excellent PR, stupidly ignorant, full of themselves- basically more in their skin.

And how I wish for a miracle..

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Something funny's happening..

She needs a sign, just to be sure..

Friday, March 13, 2015

There's no letting go..

In the midst of everything vanishing, fading, losing essence,
the name stuck- "Sam"..

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Fireworks..

It has been so many years and I think they’ve both moved on, they’ve achieved what they set out to in life. Being ambitious that they both were, no high will be too high but there is belief that they are content in their spaces, happy about the choices they made in the past and glad that destiny intervened when it did.

But I do get curious too- what if their paths cross again, if a conversation happens: will there still be fireworks..